"Concentrate Beta.. Concentrate"..Mother is almost yelling at her child. Vibrations produced out of such yelling touches child and she turns to her Mother to understand her expectations. Child understand from expressions and gestures of her mother that she has to study with concentration, but don't knew they way to concentrate. She looks at the book and start reading just to avoid unnecessary wrath of her mother. Tragedy is neither the child nor mother think about the way to concentrate as mother is busy in instructing, expecting the result and child is busy in concentrating even without knowing the way to concentrate.
"Beta.. Have your snacks, do your homework and go for play" - Mother instructed her child even without looking her as she is busy in her day to day activities (mostly watching TV :-)). Child listened to it and doesn't respond. Mother yells again looking at child "Did you understand?". Child gets frightened with vibrations produced by her yelling and responds - "OK Maa..Bewildered at the same time with multiple instructions at a time". It is interesting to note in this scenario that child responds to her mother when she looks at her and instructs her. But does child responds out of fear? or does she respond out of love? In return, can we expect the response from child in a loving way? Think on this point.
As a parent, one should really think before communicating with his/her child as you are teaching your child unknowingly the way to communicate with society. Your child imbibes you from the moment of her birth. Its not wise to expect something without even teaching her the way to accomplish. I illustrated two scenarios as above to put forth common mistakes a parent (me too :-() does while being busy in their day to day life.
Communication is important in any facet of life. How do we communicate with your own child in an effective manner without making her bewildered and confused? Here are my thoughts on it.
1. Always speak with love in a soft, slow way with low tone while looking into child eyes in a loving manner and give suffice time for her to respond. Don't be in a hurry to hear the expected response. => This will make her comfortable to think over the instructions, understand them and put her thoughts to you in a peaceful way. In addition this indirectly teach her the way to communicate with others.
2. Always speak and listen to child with undivided attention without being involved in anything else => This makes her understand that nothing is important for you in this world than speaking and listening her at that moment. This strengthen her bond with you. This indirectly teaches her the way to speak and listen to others with undivided attention. This definitely improves her concentration level as undivided attention on a subject itself is concentration.
3. Always speak in a positive way. Tell her the things that she has to do instead of saying the things that she shouldn't do. If you want to say her to sleep then say "Beta go to bed and have a sound sleep. It will make you relaxed and fresh in the morning" instead of saying "Beta if you don't sleep now then you will NOT be able to wake up early tomorrow and you will be miss to catch school bus". With first instruction child knows the very point needed ..to sleep..Its simple, straightforward and loaded up with positivism. You are sending a positive vibrations to your child. This makes child relaxed and gets quickly embraced in sleep. Second instruction has multiple unexpected outcomes which delivers negative vibrations. With these negative patterns, child's mind gets disturbed as most of the energy is spent in thinking the way to avoid unexpected outcomes rather than focusing on the needed point to do; to sleep.
A child's mind is a clean slate. Its basic responsibility of each parent to grow positive feelings in the child.
"Beta.. Have your snacks, do your homework and go for play" - Mother instructed her child even without looking her as she is busy in her day to day activities (mostly watching TV :-)). Child listened to it and doesn't respond. Mother yells again looking at child "Did you understand?". Child gets frightened with vibrations produced by her yelling and responds - "OK Maa..Bewildered at the same time with multiple instructions at a time". It is interesting to note in this scenario that child responds to her mother when she looks at her and instructs her. But does child responds out of fear? or does she respond out of love? In return, can we expect the response from child in a loving way? Think on this point.
As a parent, one should really think before communicating with his/her child as you are teaching your child unknowingly the way to communicate with society. Your child imbibes you from the moment of her birth. Its not wise to expect something without even teaching her the way to accomplish. I illustrated two scenarios as above to put forth common mistakes a parent (me too :-() does while being busy in their day to day life.
Communication is important in any facet of life. How do we communicate with your own child in an effective manner without making her bewildered and confused? Here are my thoughts on it.
1. Always speak with love in a soft, slow way with low tone while looking into child eyes in a loving manner and give suffice time for her to respond. Don't be in a hurry to hear the expected response. => This will make her comfortable to think over the instructions, understand them and put her thoughts to you in a peaceful way. In addition this indirectly teach her the way to communicate with others.
2. Always speak and listen to child with undivided attention without being involved in anything else => This makes her understand that nothing is important for you in this world than speaking and listening her at that moment. This strengthen her bond with you. This indirectly teaches her the way to speak and listen to others with undivided attention. This definitely improves her concentration level as undivided attention on a subject itself is concentration.
3. Always speak in a positive way. Tell her the things that she has to do instead of saying the things that she shouldn't do. If you want to say her to sleep then say "Beta go to bed and have a sound sleep. It will make you relaxed and fresh in the morning" instead of saying "Beta if you don't sleep now then you will NOT be able to wake up early tomorrow and you will be miss to catch school bus". With first instruction child knows the very point needed ..to sleep..Its simple, straightforward and loaded up with positivism. You are sending a positive vibrations to your child. This makes child relaxed and gets quickly embraced in sleep. Second instruction has multiple unexpected outcomes which delivers negative vibrations. With these negative patterns, child's mind gets disturbed as most of the energy is spent in thinking the way to avoid unexpected outcomes rather than focusing on the needed point to do; to sleep.
A child's mind is a clean slate. Its basic responsibility of each parent to grow positive feelings in the child.
